What are you Fighting For?

FIGHTING STANCE
© Steven Pepple | Dreamstime.com

On any given, typical day in my life, I am an easy-going, good-natured person. I am so good-natured and easy-going, that I allow myself to be the doormat for others. Then why do I feel so scrappy this week? I almost want to fight something, but I do not know what or why. I have not felt this scrappy since the time in school when some girls were beating up on my cousin and my sister. I jumped in and socked a girl twice and that was that! Who would have thought I would do something like that now…NOT ME!

So…why so scrappy? The world tells you that as you get older your body changes. You cannot do things like you used to. You cannot take things like you used to. Your body is more prone to sickness and injury. Just about everywhere I turn, I am being told things are happening to my body just because I’m getting older, and I might as well just deal with it. WHO SAID? Not GOD! My spirit is getting stronger, making me realize that I really can fight against those mindsets!

The devil will fill your head full of lies. These lies stem from the worldly point of view, not God’s point of view. The Bible tells us that the devil comes to STEAL, KILL, and DESTROY. He will enter through your mind so quietly that, before you know it, you have changed your mind to line up with the point of view of the world. You have taken what other people tell you as the truth. I have been guilty of that a lot over the years, but now I am in the process of realigning my thoughts, actions, and words to line up with what God’s Word tells me. According to the sacrifice that Jesus bore on the cross, I am ALREADY HEALED! My body may not realize it yet, but it has no choice in the matter!

So, I am finding that the scrappiness that I am feeling is more along the lines of a battle going on inside of me to line up with what the Word tells me about ME and not what the world says about me. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am mainly a quiet person unless I know you well. But lately, I’ve been wanting to come out swinging when people start talking about THEIR ailments and how this is just the lot they have drawn in life. It’s the devil that has been telling them lies, and he’s the one I’m mad at!

Am I walking in total healing? Not at this time, but I WILL! I’m doing what I need to do in the natural – hitting the gym daily, confessing healing scriptures, meditating on the good I see in me and not the negative. I try to remember to tell myself that I am created in HIS image, so I am not stupid or ugly. We have to learn to love ourselves, which is a hard thing to do at times. I feel that if we start to love ourselves more, then even when we miss it, we can move on to the next level a lot quicker in God.

Getting past ourselves is a hard thing to do. For me, that is my biggest obstacle. I have to tell myself that I love ME, and God loves me just the way I am. Let the scrappiness that is inside of you come out and fight for what is yours and give back to the devil what does not belong to you. Remember that the plans God has for you are GOOD. He wants you to prosper and be in good health and, most importantly, HE LOVES YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE!

~Ronda Sullivan

Reveal the Real

YOUNG GIRL HOLDING A MIRROR
© Ramona Smiers | Dreamstime.com

I know God accepts me just as I am, but I have a hard time accepting myself just as I am. As a matter of fact, I’d have to say that this is my BIGGEST struggle in my walk with the Lord. I always feel like I have to be perfect… or at least closer than I am. In my eyes, I have believed the lie that I am not good enough. Just knowing that God accepts me doesn’t change me. I know it, but do I believe it? I have to change the way I believe about myself and so do you!

I find myself thinking on this more and more lately. I’m sure it’s God trying to get me to deal with it. I know that once I stop rejecting His image of me and start embracing it everyday, then what I am in God’s eyes will start to manifest in my life. In my eyes, I’ve wanted to see myself as perfect. In His eyes, I can see myself as loved.

We have really over-rated perfection as Christians. I just read a statement recently that said, “I don’t think it bothers the world that we Christians sin; It bothers the world that we act like we don’t!” We have all painted a picture in our minds how a Christian should behave or look when, in fact, all God wants is for us to just be real. No matter what we look like or what mistake we just made today, we can keep on going because He accepts and loves us just as we are.

I may still struggle with this today, but I am starting to change. Because I know that God accepts me, it helps me know that I still have a chance. He will not give up on me no matter how hard-headed I may seem in this area of my life! If I say or do something to put myself down, then I have to recognize that and give it to God RIGHT THEN, asking Him to help me see myself the way He sees me. One step at a time, one day at a time is how change takes place. We have to be willing to give our insecurities, fears and self-doubt to God everyday…everyday!!

You know, WE are our biggest enemy. If we can ever get past US, then God can really use us in so many areas. I accept myself more today than I did five years ago or even a year ago. It’s a process that I am willing to walk out because I want all God has for me in His Kingdom!! I am definitely learning not to seek perfection, but to just seek being real. That’s all God is asking for from both you and me!!!

~ Michelle Parrish

Stand by Me

“You know that everyone in the province of Asia has deserted me, including Phygelus and Hermogenes.” – 2Ti 1:15 NIV

Maybe you can relate to the Apostle Paul when he wrote this to Timothy. Perhaps you’ve been in situations where you have been deserted and abandoned by all those around you. I know that I found myself in a similar situation when I decided to leave the church where I grew up. See, I had gotten filled with the Holy Ghost and my sister, who attended here at Gateway, told me I could pray in tongues as much as I wanted, whenever I wanted…and I did! Before I knew it, I had prayed myself right out of that dried up religious church I was in! Even though I knew we needed to go, I struggled for weeks before I finally got the nerve to tell anyone. I finally told my two children who loved the idea, and then I worked up enough nerve to tell my parents. Well, they were fine with it… for a day.

After it started to sink in, my Mom and Dad did not like my decision to leave their church one bit.  Before I knew it, they were bombarding me with many reasons why I shouldn’t go to Gateway: “It’s too far of a drive. Is it really worth it?” they would say. At the time, I didn’t realize that it was pretty normal for all hell to come against you when you decide to follow Holy Ghost. I even began to question myself. I had said I would never leave the church I grew up in, but I knew what God was telling me. Deep in my heart, I knew I had heard from God, but the voice of the enemy tried to creep into my thoughts during the day. I prayed myself to a place where I could hear God clearly. It may not have been what I wanted to hear, but it was what I needed to hear at the time to get me where I needed to be. As I battled against my flesh and what was familiar to me, I began to see what it really meant to have Holy Ghost as my Comforter and Stand By. Because, Lord knows I wasn’t getting any kind of comfort or support from the people who were closest to me in my life!

Once I started proclaiming what God had said to me, there was a boldness that came over me. When people from the old church came to me saying how much I was needed and appreciated where I was and that there was no need for me to go elsewhere, I was able to boldly say to them that I had discovered that God still speaks today and that He was telling me to go to Gateway Believers Fellowship. Boy, their heads would go “tilt” when I would say that to them! People got mad at me when I took a stand for what God was saying. Lifelong friends abandoned me. When I stepped out in faith, believing I was being led by God to the place where He had destined for me to be, I had to leave everything that I was familiar with behind me. When you hear the Master’s voice, you cannot be swayed. God said He would never leave or forsake you, and He is so faithful to His word. When others criticized, Holy Ghost comforted. When others turned their backs on me, Holy Ghost stood by me. God provided a peace that passes understanding, and I have never regretted a day since I came to Gateway!

~By Tammy Sanders

Love Breaks Through Fear

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” ~1 John 3:18

From an early age the Devil worked hard to make me scared of everything. I had constant nightmares and waking visions, causing me to fear spiritual things. I was that guy who could never get the right words out of his mouth, so I feared public ridicule. Having been the victim of child molestation, I grew into an adult terrified of intimacy. Fear caused me to avoid people and any responsibilities that would cause me to interact with others in any way. I instinctively rejected people for solitary pursuits, knowing that people would only hurt me more then I felt equipped to bear.

When we came to Gateway and I entered into fasting and praying in tongues, God started unraveling pieces of my fearful soul, and I experienced breakthrough in many areas. I gained confidence in my abilities, and I learned to be comfortable enough around people to hold down a job for the first time in my life. These changes were good, but there was still more to be done. Through mortification, I reached a place where the Love of God began to deal with me about my fears and insecurities. Holy Spirit wanted to expose them and show me how to deal with them, but I didn’t believe I could face those fears and I didn’t want others to know about them. I realized I had become a fake, a façade… willing to live a life I could control with intellect and logic, but not willing to really open up to the Love of God or the love of others.

Instead of pressing in and trusting God, I ran from Him and I ran from the church. For eight years I was out of church and out of God’s will for my life. During that time, I was a faithful employee and a “good person.” I was kind to my wife, and I dedicated all my free time to building a community project that helped others. I thought I was ok, because I still prayed in tongues occasionally, I read my bible once in a while, God never convicted me for leaving the church, and I never spoke evil against the leaders of the church or hindered my wife’s attendance. Despite all the “good” I did, those same old fears controlled me, guiding my decisions and actions. Over time, patterns of isolation took over again. Those hidden fears manifested in full force and I pushed back against people so hard that I almost pushed them all away.

God, in His mercy, gave me a wake-up call. Facing the possibility of losing everything that was important to me, I finally accepted that something had to change…and that something was me. Sitting alone, crying from grief and pain, I realized just how much I hurt everyone in my life. I knew that if I did not face my fears, I would wind up loveless, friendless, and homeless. I also realized the only hope I would ever have to be the man I must be is to trust the Lord. I cried out to Jesus and asked Him to forgive me for my disobedience and the hurt I’ve caused others, and He immediately overwhelmed me with His love and forgiveness. He told me it wasn’t too late to turn things around if I would trust Him and accept His love completely.

To achieve breakthrough, I have had to repent to God and to those I’ve hurt. I’ve had to forgive myself, as well as those who hurt me. By God’s Mercy, I receive forgiveness for each of my transgressions and the Grace required to help me make amends. It’s only because of His mercy that I don’t worry about missed opportunities. My hope is that as I continue to die to myself and depend on Him, His perfect Love working in me will provide what I cannot provide for others. Every day I experience His strength working through my weaknesses. It has been an uncomfortable process, but with each step His Love is breaking through in my life, and I am walking free from years of fear and bondage.

All praise, glory and honor to my Lord Jesus Christ, the light and hope of my salvation, Amen!

~by guest contributor (and husband of Anessa), Eric Back

Wanted

What does it mean to be wanted? As babies, we all need love and support in order to grow, right? Well, in today’s society that’s a rare occurrence. I say that because most of us don’t know what real love is. We’ve all experienced someone telling us they ‘loved’ us only to disappear when things get hard. Real love is constant through the good times and bad. Love is a bridge over all of the hurt and pain in your life.

Kids often struggle with feeling wanted. They often try to change themselves to fit in with a certain group. Since I had a disability, I sometimes felt like kids couldn’t relate to me. Even family members had a hard time dealing with my disability. They would avoid being around me because they couldn’t deal with seeing me hurting. It was hard for them to cope with many of the things that go along with having a disabled child. What they didn’t realize was that all I ever wanted was for them to accept me.

Now that I’m older, I’ve realized that God loved me from the moment I was conceived in my mother’s womb. He intricately formed my features and loved me unconditionally before I ever breathed my first breath. In fact, I was actually a perfectly healthy baby in the womb, but because my brother and I were born so prematurely, I was put on a ventilator that caused a brain bleed and led to cerebral palsy. The CP, however, couldn’t take away from me the love or the plan that God has for my life. I know that He wants me and needs me to be a part of His kingdom, just as I am.

I’m so glad he loves me even when the world doesn’t understand me. I’m so glad He saved my life when I was a tiny baby. I’m so glad He is able to look past my wheelchair, my unsteady walk, and my scars. I’m so glad He wants me.

And you know what? God wants you, too!

~Madison Sanders

Read more from Madison : Making my Mark

What Do You Call Embarrassment?

I’ve been through a bunch of titles for this post…

Change Only Happens When You Know Someone Else is Watching… or

Face It: If it Didn’t Happen in Public, You Would Never Fix It… or

Public Embarrassment: Is There Really Any Other Kind?

You can come up with one of your own, but I think you get the point. People don’t change just because they want to… there’s usually a reason for us to wake up and realize change is necessary. Unfortunately, we don’t usually even notice the need for change until we know that other people know we need to. So… here’s a little story from my life that got me thinking again about change. You can give it any title you want!

This year started off with a bang for me… or maybe it was a “beep.” A great big, giant BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP!!!! I left the local grocery store with a few items, hopped into my car, and the alarm started going off. I never even use the alarm on my car, and the key fob with the control for the alarm is broken. I couldn’t get the noise to stop! I was so embarrassed to be sitting in my own car, alarm blaring, and me not knowing what to do! Finally, the noise stopped, I breathed a sigh of relief, and put the key in the ignition… and the alarm went off AGAIN!!! Frantically, I called my husband to tell me what he thought I should do. Between the two of us, we figured it out, but not before I was sweating bullets from embarrassment! I have never been so happy to drive away from anyplace!!!

As I drove out of the parking lot, I started laughing at myself. Why was I so embarrassed? What was it in me that made me feel upset to be seen as a complete and total idiot in front of anyone who was at the store? That has never happened before…why couldn’t it have happened in the safety of my own driveway?!

And then I got to thinking… that’s really just the way it is. All hell can be breaking loose in our lives, every alarm, bell, and whistle screaming for our attention, and we think it’s okay as long as no one else is watching. It really isn’t that uncomfortable for us unless someone else IS watching! Once we know that our situation is visible to EVERYONE, then we’re more likely to change. As long as we can hide out in our own little lives, we won’t make many adjustments. As soon as our “alarms” start going off in public, drawing attention to us, we sit up and take notice.

So, I realize that all those things that cause alarms to go off inside my spirit are easy for me to hide as long as I’m the only one who hears them. BUT… when others start to notice, then I will finally call for help so I can do something about them! And THAT, my friends, is the way I started 2010!

How has YOUR year started??

~Linda Frederick

All Dressed Up and Someplace To Go

 

Watching teenagers get ready for Prom is an interesting experience. These otherwise confident (and often cocky!) young people become suddenly nervous and unsure. “Will I look okay?” “Can I walk in these heels?” “What will my friends say when they see me?” As they dress in their brand new “grown up” clothes, they are transformed into someone new. Suddenly, they realize their old “confidence” was a façade; really only the immature way most teens deal with insecurity and the fear of rejection.

But these new clothes…they make a difference in the wearer. They look older. They feel older. They stand straight and tall. They are empowered by the suit to try things they have never tried before…a fancy dinner date, a new dance move. The suit allows them to become a glorified version of their selves.

Along with a new sense of self, the clothes bring something else: discomfort. They’re new and not broken in. They fell stiff and “unnatural.” Shoes wear blisters on tender feet. Ties and vests inhibit movement. The strength and power that comes with the suit soon gives place to the difficulty in wearing something so out of the ordinary.

Like Cinderella’s beautiful gown, the magnificent prom garments disappear and are replaced with old, comfortable clothing. In the mind of the wearer, the tuxedo and gown become connected with an event. They are not for everyday life. Those are clothes you only wear when you have something special to do, someplace important to go.

But the memory of being transformed into that “other” self lingers on…

Use every piece of God’s armor to resist the enemy in the time of evil, so that after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that you will be fully prepared. In every battle you will need faith as your shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed at you by Satan. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all Christians everywhere.        – Ephesians 6:13-18, NLT

As believers, we have special clothes, too. And they make a difference in the wearer. They look like Jesus. They feel the strength and power of His might coursing through them. They stand straight and tall, unmoved by circumstances and attacks of the enemy. They are empowered by the suit to try things they have never tried before…boldly confessing the Word, walking in love and forgiveness, being led by the Holy Spirit…and maybe even trying a new dance move during times of worship. This suit transforms the wearer into the glorified version of themselves.

Not unlike the fancy prom clothes, the Armor of God often brings discomfort. It is not always convenient or comfortable to tell the truth and walk in righteousness. Allowing the peace of God to rule and reign in our lives, rather than giving way to frustration and anger, often rubs us the wrong way and makes it difficult to stand in these new shoes. It is truly an “out of the ordinary” suit that the carnal nature resists. It can become easy for us to think, “I only need this armor for special times or extreme emergencies. This is not a suit for every day.” Soon, the power and peace of God becomes a memory…

But we have some place to go and something to do for the Kingdom every single day of our lives. We are all dressed up for a reason! We have an assignment for which God has given us all the tools we need to be successful. In this new season, we still have the same old devil to contend with. So clothe yourself daily with the Armor of God. Stand against the enemy and when you’re done with one round, stay clothed and ready for the next.

Dress your part…and stay dressed!

Prison Break

Alcatraz. Let images of the infamous prison stronghold on a windswept Pacific coast island roll through your mind. The most notorious criminal minds of the age were imprisoned here – men who could not be contained or controlled in any of the other maximum-security penitentiaries in the country: George “Machine Gun” Kelley, Robert “The Birdman” Stroud, Al Capone. Rigid discipline, gun galleries at each end of the cell block, twelve inmate counts per day, and a one to three guard to inmate ratio kept every prisoner under a watchful eye. Yet some escaped.

Officially, none of the 14 attempts were successful. But in 1962, three convicted bank robbers implemented an ingenious escape plan that has become one of the great mysteries of history. For months, the three convicts used sharpened spoons stolen from the cafeteria to tunnel through the cement walls of their cells into an unguarded utility corridor. On the night of June 11, they placed dummy heads crafted from a mixture of soap, toilet paper and real hair in their beds to fool the night guards and exited their cells. The three climbed utility pipes to the top of the cellblock and gained access to the roof through an air vent. Climbing down a drainpipe at the end of the cell house, they made their way to the water where a makeshift raft crafted from stolen raincoats and plywood awaited them. At approximately 10 pm, they entered San Francisco Bay never to be seen again.

Did they survive their escape attempt? Did they ever truly make it to freedom? We may never know. But we can learn from their effort and apply their creative tenacity to help us escape from our own personal prisons.

“What prison? I’m a tongue talking, Bible believing, tithing, praying Christian. I’m free!”

Right. What you really are is a prisoner with privileges. You are free to walk around outside your cell for short periods of time, but eventually, you return to your cell to be counted and confined just like all the other inmates. We are all imprisoned in our minds in some areas. Our cell walls are built out of pride, fear, insecurity, jealousy, rejection, and lust. The corridors of our thoughts are guarded by legalism, tradition, and religion. We are confined in our minds to the familiar routine of prison life. What is “out there?” What is beyond our confinement? There’s only one way to know…

It’s time to execute the plan. It’s time to leave the old image of ourselves behind on our beds. It’s time to sharpen our swords, using the Word of God to dig our way through the walls that confine us. It’s time for us to pray in the spirit, causing our spirit to rise above our flesh with all of the old guards of legalism, religion, and familiarity. It’s time to recognize that we have access to the Father through worship. It’s time for us to launch out into the deep by faith, trusting that His grace will usher us to new ground. It’s time to claim our freedom…

It’s time for a Prison Break!