Real Church. Real Life. Real Celebration.

Each year, Gateway Believers starts a seeking time that is forty days long. Each person purposes to fast what God has led him or her to fast. Our goal is not to change God but to change us. My understanding is that as we seek God, He will reveal things that are inside of us preventing us from going to the next level in His Kingdom. I do know that in previous seeking times He has shown me things about me that needed to change. The choice to change is always left up to me, just as it is with you.

With each seeking time there was always such a relief when it was over. I have yet to go the forty days straight without falling out and having to start back over, but I do start over each time. This year’s seeking time was so different in so many ways. The end to Seeking Time has come and gone and I still find myself in a “seeking time” battle. My spirit wants and desires to grow closer to Him. I go days where I am praying in tongues, talking to Him, meditating on His Word, feeling so excited about life and what God is doing, and then all of a sudden, BAM! I am in a battle to make it through the day.

I hear my spirit saying, “pray in tongues, worship, or even call someone” but it feels as if there is a four-ton weight preventing me from doing so. You feel as if you are struggling for air to breath much less to pray. I do finally shift the weight enough eventually to where I start praying in tongues and then I move into worship, which breaks through the heaviness. I know the process I am going through is that I am dying to myself, so that there is less of me and what I want in my life and more of God and what He wants in my life. I know this battle is not over with my flesh. I DO KNOW THAT I WILL BREAK THROUGH!

God’s Word tells us that the plans that He has for us is GOOD! So when you are going through the sifter, just remember that God is doing a Good work in your life and He has an AWESOME plan for you if you choose to press on through the sifter. It is never an easy process, but it is a much-needed one if we are going to fulfill the destiny He has planned for us. Keep pressing and you will be glad that you did!

~Ronda Sullivan


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